Frequently Asked Questions
What is perimenopause?Perimenopause is the transitional phase before menopause when estrogen levels fluctuate and eventually decline. Or, as this book puts it, a middle-aged corporate restructuring that no one asked for. It typically starts in the early-to-mid 40s and can last over a decade. Symptoms include irregular periods, hot flashes, sleep disruption, brain fog, mood changes, weight gain, and a long list of other things nobody warned you about. This book isn’t a medical guide, but it captures what that experience actually feels like.
Is there a book about perimenopause that's funny?Yes. “Where the F&ck Did All My Best Qualities Go?” is a fully illustrated humour book that tells the story of perimenopause as a corporate restructuring. Every trait that disappears is a character who quit without notice. It’s not a medical book. It’s the book you give someone so they know they’re not alone, and so they laugh instead of cry.
What's a funny gift for a friend turning 45 or 50?A book about the corporate restructuring happening inside her body. Beautifully illustrated estrogen-molecule characters, each one representing a trait that’s quietly walked out. It’s the gift that makes her laugh, then text you “how did you know.”
What is “Where the F&ck Did All My Best Qualities Go?”It’s a fully illustrated humour book by Alex Furrer about the experience of perimenopause, told as a corporate restructuring. The characters are estrogen molecules, each one representing a trait that’s been reassigned, demoted, or laid off. It’s funny, honest, and designed to be given as a gift.
Who wrote the book?Alex Furrer is a writer and advertising creative director based in Toronto. The characters are original estrogen-molecule illustrations created for the book. Alex also conducted a study on how midlife women wish brands would talk to them. The answer: honestly.
How long does shipping take?All Canada-wide shipping is done through Canada Post. Once shipped, orders should arrive in about 2 days in the Greater Toronto Area and about 5 days across Canada.
When does perimenopause start?Most women begin experiencing perimenopause between 40 and 45, though it can start earlier. The frustrating part is that many women don’t realize what’s happening until they’re deep in it. That’s part of why this book exists: to give women more foresight than most of us had.
What's a good gift for women going through perimenopause?Something that makes her feel seen, not fixed. This book was designed as exactly that: a gift that says “I see what you’re going through, and it’s okay to laugh about it.” It pairs well with wine, a hot pad, and a complete lack of judgment.
What is brain fog in perimenopause?
Brain fog during perimenopause is the experience of forgetting words, losing your train of thought, walking into rooms with no memory of why, and struggling to express ideas that used to come quickly. It’s caused by fluctuating estrogen levels, which affect neurotransmitter function. In this book, that experience is personified by the departure of Quick-Thinking, who was replaced by the far slower Umm-You-Know-That-Thing-With-The-Thing.
Who is this book for?Women in or approaching perimenopause, and the people who love them. It’s a gift book, not a self-help book.
Is this a medical book?No. It’s a humour book based on personal experience. If you’re looking for medical advice on perimenopause, please consult your healthcare provider. If you’re looking for something that makes you feel less alone and more like laughing, this is it.
Do you ship internationally?Currently, we ship only directly from here within Canada, but we’re working to change that asap. As soon as this hot flash passes.
However, Where the F&ck Did All My Best Qualities Go? is available on Amazon.com for those outside of Canada.
What are the symptoms of perimenopause?The commonly cited list includes 34+ symptoms: hot flashes, night sweats, brain fog, mood swings, weight gain, joint pain, insomnia, anxiety, reduced patience, and many more. In this book, those symptoms show up as characters, including Sleeps-Soundly-All-Night (who vanished at 2:17 AM), Looks-Great-In-Jeans (who betrayed you overnight), and Quick-Thinking (who was replaced by Umm-You-Know-That-Thing-With-The-Thing).
What's a good gift for women over 40?If she’s in or near perimenopause (and statistically, she probably is), a book that makes her laugh about it is more meaningful than another candle. “Where the F&ck Did All My Best Qualities Go?” is an illustrated gift book about the traits that perimenopause reassigns, demotes, or lays off entirely.
Why does no one talk about perimenopause?
Good question. Perimenopause affects roughly half the population, yet most women report being caught off guard by it. Research funding for women’s health, and perimenopause in particular, has historically been underfunded. Part of the reason this book was written was to normalize the conversation and make it easier to share with humor rather than silence. And thankfully people are starting to talk about it more and more.
How many pages is it?
It’s a short, 32-page illustrated gift book. Something you read in one sitting and then leave on your nightstand, coffee table, or a friend’s doorstep.
Is this book available in bookstores?The book is distributed through IngramSpark, which means bookstores, libraries, and online retailers can order it. If your local bookstore doesn’t carry it, they can order it through Ingram. You can also purchase it directly at wherethef.com.
What is your return policy?Like the gift of perimenopause, all sales are final. However, if a book is damaged, please send an email to alex@alexfurrer.com along with a photo and your order number, and we’ll send you a replacement.